Jokes April 2017

[hoe]

A husband and wife were driving home in their car one Saturday evening when a traffic officer pulls them over.

"Good evening sir" says the cop. "Good evening officer, what seems to be the problem?" says the husband with a friendly and cooperative smile.

"Sir, I noticed one of your headlights are not burning, I'm afraid I'm going to have to write you a ticket." "Oh officer" says the man, "this is honestly the first I know of it, last night both were still burning brilliantly, I check them regularly, but tonight I forgot."

"Rubbish!" the wife chips in. "Officer, I've been telling him about it for a month now, and he still hasn't fixed the damn thing."

The husband turns to his wife and under his breath he says to her: "What the f*ck woman?! Would you shut your mouth? What the hell are you doing?"

"U-ummm" the officer interrupts. "I see your one wiper-blade is perished too sir, I'm afraid that's another ticket." "Oh officer, that's the first I know of it, honestly, I just replaced the things a week ago! Must have been a defective pair I bought." says the man, very humbly.

"O c'mon! Officer, that thing's been like that for two months, longer than the headlight! Every time it rains, I nearly crash because I can't see through the windscreen. He just refuses to listen to me asking him to fix it." the wife interjects again.

"What the f*ck!!!?" the husband grumbles to her under his breath. "Are you stupid? What the f*ck are you doing woman?!"

The officer leans into the car and says "Ma'am, is your husband always this rude to you?" "Oh no" she answers. "Only when he's had too much to drink!"

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[HKBIGDADDYDIESELDAN]

A husband and wife were driving home in their car one Saturday evening when a traffic officer pulls them over.

"Good evening sir" says the cop. "Good evening officer, what seems to be the problem?" says the husband with a friendly and cooperative smile.

"Sir, I noticed one of your headlights are not burning, I'm afraid I'm going to have to write you a ticket." "Oh officer" says the man, "this is honestly the first I know of it, last night both were still burning brilliantly, I check them regularly, but tonight I forgot."

"Rubbish!" the wife chips in. "Officer, I've been telling him about it for a month now, and he still hasn't fixed the damn thing."

The husband turns to his wife and under his breath he says to her: "What the f*ck woman?! Would you shut your mouth? What the hell are you doing?"

"U-ummm" the officer interrupts. "I see your one wiper-blade is perished too sir, I'm afraid that's another ticket." "Oh officer, that's the first I know of it, honestly, I just replaced the things a week ago! Must have been a defective pair I bought." says the man, very humbly.

"O c'mon! Officer, that thing's been like that for two months, longer than the headlight! Every time it rains, I nearly crash because I can't see through the windscreen. He just refuses to listen to me asking him to fix it." the wife interjects again.

"What the f*ck!!!?" the husband grumbles to her under his breath. "Are you stupid? What the f*ck are you doing woman?!"

The officer leans into the car and says "Ma'am, is your husband always this rude to you?" "Oh no" she answers. "Only when he's had too much to drink!"

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Ha Ha

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