Jokes for March 2017

[Polaraco]

"Do you remember that row twenty years ago when we sat down to write a list of each others faults?" I said to the wife.

"Oh God yes, I still have mine somewhere, " she said with a giggle.

"I've finished, " I replied.

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[hoe]

I recently picked a new primary care doctor.
After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well'
for my age. (I just turned " sixty-ish").
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, 'Do you
think I'll live to be 80?'
He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer, wine or hard liquor?
'Oh no,' I replied. 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'
Then he asked, 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued Ribs? '
I said, 'Not much... my former doctor said that all red meat is very
unhealthy!'
'Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, boating, sailing,
hiking, or bicycling?'
'No, I don't,' I said.
He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lots of sex?'
'No,' I said...
He looked at me and said, 'Then, why do you even give a ****?'

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[DanO]

I am sure that you guys have heard these 5 deadly words used by your wife or girl friend.

1) “Fine” – This is the word women use to end an argument when she knows she is right and you need to shut up.

2) “Nothing” – means “Something” and you need to be worried.

3) “Go Ahead” – this is a dare, not permission, don't do it.

4) “Whatever” – A women's way of saying screw you.

5) “That's Okay” – She is thinking long and hard on how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Bonus Word: “Wow!” – This is not a compliment; she's amazed that one person could be so stupid.

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[Polaraco]

I am sure that you guys have heard these 5 deadly words used by your wife or girl friend. http://www.challengertalk.com/forums..._smile_big.png

1) “Fine” – This is the word women use to end an argument when she knows she is right and you need to shut up.

2) “Nothing” – means “Something” and you need to be worried.

3) “Go Ahead” – this is a dare, not permission, don't do it.

4) “Whatever” – A women's way of saying screw you.

5) “That's Okay” – She is thinking long and hard on how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Bonus Word: “Wow!” – This is not a compliment; she's amazed that one person could be so stupid.

True

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[HKBIGDADDYDIESELDAN]

I recently picked a new primary care doctor.
After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, he said I was doing 'fairly well'
for my age. (I just turned " sixty-ish").
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, 'Do you
think I'll live to be 80?'
He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer, wine or hard liquor?
'Oh no,' I replied. 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'
Then he asked, 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued Ribs? '
I said, 'Not much... my former doctor said that all red meat is very
unhealthy!'
'Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, boating, sailing,
hiking, or bicycling?'
'No, I don't,' I said.
He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lots of sex?'
'No,' I said...
He looked at me and said, 'Then, why do you even give a ****?'

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Ha Ha

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[HKBIGDADDYDIESELDAN]

True

Agreed

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